When I Struggle to Leave my Past in the Past

Last night, I started to work on this website and I was feeling excited about using my gift of writing to encourage someone else. But as I was driving to work I started thinking about all of the foolish things that I've said and done in my past.

I cringed at the thought of God actually watching my behaviour and listening to the rubbish that came out of my mouth. Even though I repented for these things years ago, the thoughts of what I said and did still managed to come to back to try and make me relive the guilt.

I quickly came to realise that these thoughts were not from God because He had already forgiven me, so where did they actually come from?

satan was trying to drag me down. I had to quickly put my foot down, if I gave him a foot hold, I would have probably spent the day feeling low which could have almost likely resulted in putting a stop to creating this blog. Ephesians 4:37 tells me that I shouldn't give satan an opportunity to come in, so I had to stop him in his tracks right there and then by believing what God said in His word about forgiveness and understanding that I already possess the power and authority to reject lies from satan.

““So let God work his will in you. Yell a loud no to the Devil and watch him scamper.”
James 4:7
The Message”

I just want you to know that your past is not a surprise to God as He is the creator of all living things and He has seen it all before. The Bible is proof of this.

Jeremiah 31:3 tells us that God said: “I've never stopped loving you and never will. Look forward to my continuous love!” God's love for us is eternal, it did not end when you turned your back on Him, when you made those silly mistakes, when everyone else turned their backs on you or when others hurt and rejected you. There is nothing you can do to stop Him from loving you. If you have been given a specific task to do for God, keep pushing on and don't let the thoughts of your past abort your dreams and visions.

In the Bible, Hagar got herself into serious trouble! She was left alone with her son in the wilderness because she had an illegitimate child with Abraham who was already married! Abraham’s wife, Sarah, couldn't have children and Hagar was promised that if she gave Abraham a son, they would be looked after. When things went wrong, she found herself alone with her son. Hagar more than likely felt used and rejected. Her situation probably made her feel worthless like a piece of old furniture that was tossed into the street and forgotten about. She turned to God for help and He heard her desperate cry and promised that a great nation would come from her child, Ishmael also. (Read Genesis 21:10-21)

Rehab was a prostitute and God saved her just because she had faith in Him (Read Hebrews 11:31)

Zacchaeus was a tax collector who was a cheat because he would collect more tax than what was required and kept the extra for himself to become rich. God saved him because he sought after Jesus and was willing to change. (Read Luke 19: 1-10)

The woman of Samaria had five husbands and the man that she was with at the time when she met Jesus was not even one of them! God saved her because she had a desire for a new life with Jesus. (Read St John 4:1-42)

In each of these situations everyone had different reasons for seeking God. The Lord did not judge them by their past or their situations. He looked beyond their faults and just saw their needs and now, God is ready to do something new in your life. So you can no longer allow your past to determine your future.

It's time to let go and move forward - start walking.

Great Expectations

Guys, guess what? I approached a stranger today and briefly told them about my walk with God; I even managed to share a part of my testimony. You're probably thinking to yourself: "That's no big deal, shouldn't all Christians do that?” Well, sadly this is something that I’ve been struggling with. My fear of rejection had hindered me from evangelising, but today God gave me the boldness to just go for it.  I was so elated that I felt as if I was walking on water. I just couldn't believe that I actually did it; I had achieved my good deed for the day.

When I'm at home, I'm usually lumbered with the delightful task of tidying the room for my two sons who are aged three and six; however, a few weeks ago, I decided to ask the boys to do it themselves. I left them alone to get the job done and after about 10 minutes, they came running down the stairs shouting: "Mummy, mummy, come and look at our room now."

I opened the door to see their bedroom looking somewhat tidier; however, a few of their toys were hanging out of the drawers and some were still left on the floor in the corner of the room.

Their massive ecstatic grins told me that they eagerly awaited praise for a job well done because in their eyes, they did the best job that they could do. Even though my boys didn't clean the room to my standard, I still gave them a hug and let them know that I was very proud. I could tell that they tried their best; however, as they get older, I will expect more from my children when it comes to cleaning up after themselves.

These are my babies, thank you Lord for my family.

Sometimes when we achieve something great for the Lord, we perceive this as a job well done and this can cause us to feel as if we don't have to make an effort to aspire for anything greater.

We must remember that God is our creator; therefore He owes us nothing. God will expect more of us as we grow in Christ. This walk will continue until we reach our final destination which is Heaven. There's always going to be deeper depths and higher heights to reach. It's not time for us to put up our feet just yet.

To those of you, who have accomplished great things for the Lord, I'd like to say well done, but what's your next challenge?

“So then, brothers and sisters, we ask and encourage you in the Lord Jesus to keep living the way you already are and even do better in how you live and please God—just as you learned from us.”

 1 Thessalonians 4:1 CEB